Thursday, January 29, 2009

A Small Death in the Family

Roobarb in happier times.

Farewell to old Roobarb, who died peacefully in his sleep on Tuesday afternoon for no readily apparent reason.

He was a loopy, lazy, incredibly greedy food-ponce with a definate sense of humour and character all his own.

I know non-cat people don't get it, but a downed cat leaves a definate hole in the household fabric.

He's been interred in a spot in the garden which will get the summer sun nearly all day, wherein he can rest in furry Valhalla and dream of torturing little feathered things for all eternity.

Friday, January 23, 2009

Thought I'd Have a Go Too...

Confirm your new petition to the Prime Minister - 'Call an immediate General Election, we the people have no confidence in this Government, and demand the right to select your successors without further delay.'‏

It's waiting approval by 'The No. 10 team'. I await developments with interest.

Link to follow?

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Quote of the Day

As always, the exemplary Leg-iron nails the situation with surgical accuracy:

We don't like being told what to do. We will do the opposite of what we are told to do, for no other reason than that we were told to do it.

If government realised that, this would be a much easier country to govern and a much better place to live.

Really. The man makes me sick. I'm going to have a nice lie down with my thesaurus.

Ask Not What MtK Can Do For You...

Courtesy of Samizdata, this fun little gewgaw.

My fellow Americans, today is a moist day. You have shown the world that "hope" is not just another word for "dishwasher", and that "change" is not only something we can believe in again, but something we can actually grope.

Today we celebrate, but let there be no mistake – America faces ugly and feculent challenges like never before. Our economy is flatulent. Americans can barely afford their mortgages, let alone have enough money left over for goitres. Our healthcare system is foul. If your sphincter is sick and you don't have insurance, you might as well call a solicitor. And America's image overseas is tarnished like a bat divebomber. But fondling together we can right this ship, and set a course for Stoke Poges.

Finally, I must thank my thick family, my slimy campaign volunteers, but most of all, I want to thank masochists for making this historic occasion possible. Of course, I must also thank you, President Bush, for years of exposing the American people. Without your warty efforts, none of this would have been possible.

See, even I can do it...

What a Toothsome Little Notion

His Satanic Majesty has had a small flash of genius.

These days, more and more of us are falling victim to the deceitful and distasteful practice of astroturfing. This is where an organisation (usually a government) will fund a front organisation which then purports to be a grassroots campaign force while simply supporting their paymaster's policies.

An ideal example of this is Action on Smoking and Health, a particularly cynical and blatant lie factory; which while purporting to be a charity is almost completely funded by the Department of Health and sundry fellow travellers. If they were reliant on donations, they couldn't even afford to rent an office.

DK has also noticed this explosion in 'charities' that continually pontificate on our lifestyles, life choices etc. etc.; in terms which are remarkably synchronus with whatever hobby horse Spongebrain Fudgepants and his Carnival of Turds happen to be trying to stuff down our throats at any given time.

Thus the government can turn around with a thick sheaf of bog-roll statistics and say, with a straight face, "Seventy-eight percent of all UK householders want us to shove red hot pokers up their bung-holes, this charity's research proves it".

Astroturfing started in the USA, but the EU was very quick to see the possibilities and routinely funds organisations to tell them (and more importantly us) what they want to hear. Needless to say, our 'government' always on the lookout for dirty and disreputable ways to fuck and rape the (taxpaying) electorate, siezed on the notion like Mandy on a Moroccan rent-boy.

Accordingly, Satan's decided to start this indispensible new accessory for the well jaundiced cynic-about-town.

Fill your boots ladies and gentlemen, let's get the list populated with these fuckers ASAP, and then spread the word.

Monday, January 19, 2009

Man Your Battle Stations

Tomorrow, the USA inaugurates a new messiah, sorry, President. Bearing in mind how the mendacious filth that infests the Westminster whorehouse used Heathrow expansion to try and camouflage their vile behaviour last week; be on your guard for the rest of this week.

Viddy well o my brothers. Viddy well.

Saturday, January 10, 2009

And it Just Goes On and On...

A Government data store, earlier today.

Via the estimable Master Puddlecote, a little more NuLabour hands-down-the-back-of-our-trousers bullshit.

From March all internet service providers (ISPs) will by law have to keep information about every e-mail sent or received in the UK for a year.

What is it with our masters?

When the intelligence and security services are constantly searching for needles in haystacks, what on earth is the point in constantly adding more and bigger fucking haystacks?

These people are beyond stupid.


Longrider's on it too.