Wednesday, January 21, 2009

What a Toothsome Little Notion

His Satanic Majesty has had a small flash of genius.

These days, more and more of us are falling victim to the deceitful and distasteful practice of astroturfing. This is where an organisation (usually a government) will fund a front organisation which then purports to be a grassroots campaign force while simply supporting their paymaster's policies.

An ideal example of this is Action on Smoking and Health, a particularly cynical and blatant lie factory; which while purporting to be a charity is almost completely funded by the Department of Health and sundry fellow travellers. If they were reliant on donations, they couldn't even afford to rent an office.

DK has also noticed this explosion in 'charities' that continually pontificate on our lifestyles, life choices etc. etc.; in terms which are remarkably synchronus with whatever hobby horse Spongebrain Fudgepants and his Carnival of Turds happen to be trying to stuff down our throats at any given time.

Thus the government can turn around with a thick sheaf of bog-roll statistics and say, with a straight face, "Seventy-eight percent of all UK householders want us to shove red hot pokers up their bung-holes, this charity's research proves it".

Astroturfing started in the USA, but the EU was very quick to see the possibilities and routinely funds organisations to tell them (and more importantly us) what they want to hear. Needless to say, our 'government' always on the lookout for dirty and disreputable ways to fuck and rape the (taxpaying) electorate, siezed on the notion like Mandy on a Moroccan rent-boy.

Accordingly, Satan's decided to start this indispensible new accessory for the well jaundiced cynic-about-town.

Fill your boots ladies and gentlemen, let's get the list populated with these fuckers ASAP, and then spread the word.

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